It is very important that Brie and I parent like God "parents" us. He does so with grace.
God does not lay guilt trips. He does not set up legalistic rules and get extremely angry when we break rules. He knows that we are going to make lots of mistakes. Instead of always telling us how disappointed we are making Him, He comes along side us with an attitude similar to, "I know that you are sinful, that you make mistakes and that you struggle with the things that you do. I am here for you to help you get through this and to help you improve in these areas because in love you and I want what is best for you. I will be patient with you because I love you.". Brie and I must adopt these same attitudes.
When we parent with grace similar to the grace that God has for us, it helps to instil in our children a loving attitude for God and for others. Faith is not something that you can force on hour children. It is something that they "catch" as a result of having it displayed to them by their parents.
It is important to realize that parenting in a fraxe- based way does not mean that there are never consequences, for of course thee are. However, part of those consequences should not be yelling and screaming and telling our children how much they have made is sad and disappointed us. We must display grace and love at all times.
Friday, 21 March 2014
Tuesday, 18 March 2014
Guardrails to protect your marriage
1. Don't travel with members of the opposite sex
2. Don't have meals alone with members of the opposite sex
3. Don't try and fix people of the opposite sex. If they need help, get them help, but it is not wise for you yourself to provide that help.
4. If you feel like you are being tempted or drawn toward someone, FLEE! And also go and tell someone to keep you accountable. In would go as far as to say it isnwise to flee and tell someone if you even feel like you are starting to enjoy the company of someone from the opposite sex more than what is normal (I.e. more than the common family friend).
5. Don't confide, or allow yourself to be confided in, by members of the opposite sex.
6. If you ever get into a situation where you feel like you are trapped in one of these situations, first do everything you can to get out of it, and second make sure you make a phone call to tell your spouse and do this immediately.
7. Ask yourself in every dealing with the opposite sex, "Would I feel comfortable revealing everything about this situation to my spouse?". The answer needs to ALWAYS be yes. If the answer is getting even close to no, then you must RUN from that situation.
8. Don't be alone anywhere with anyone of the opposite sex.
9. Don't talk about personal or sensitive issues with members of the opposite sex.
10. Don't joke too much with mvers of the opposite sex. Sticking to one joke a meeting is probably a good principle to follow.
11. Know yourself and set up any other guardrails that you feel are important for you to follow.
These will seem extreme to society, but they are not. They are wise. After all, these are the things that we all want our spouse and children to follow, so of course we should do these things ourselves.
It is important to realize that our society baits us to get involved with sexual immorality. Just look at media in our culture. They bait us and then scold if people actually succumb. Therefore, it is extremely important to set up guardrails which are VERY FAR from the line of what is inappropriate. This makes sure that you never get tons point that you shouldn't be in. It also ensures that if you bump onto one of your guardrails, your conscience feels terrible. It feels as if you have done something very sinful. This is a good thing if you have set your guardrails up properly. A proper guardrail is in a place that is not sinful, but again, since it is a meaningful guardrail to protect yourself and those you love, you should feel terrible.
I love Brie so incredibly much. And because of this I don't care if people think I am crazy or extreme in following these guardrails. They are not extreme, they are wise, and lead to a happier, more blessed marriage. Why wouldn't I keep these? It would be stupid not to.
In general, when it comes to decisions and guardrails, it is important to always make wise decisions right from the start. Once you give in to temptation once, it makes it easier to give in again, while at the same time it makes it more difficult to go back and stop resisting temptation. Set your boundaries and always stick into them right from the start.
2. Don't have meals alone with members of the opposite sex
3. Don't try and fix people of the opposite sex. If they need help, get them help, but it is not wise for you yourself to provide that help.
4. If you feel like you are being tempted or drawn toward someone, FLEE! And also go and tell someone to keep you accountable. In would go as far as to say it isnwise to flee and tell someone if you even feel like you are starting to enjoy the company of someone from the opposite sex more than what is normal (I.e. more than the common family friend).
5. Don't confide, or allow yourself to be confided in, by members of the opposite sex.
6. If you ever get into a situation where you feel like you are trapped in one of these situations, first do everything you can to get out of it, and second make sure you make a phone call to tell your spouse and do this immediately.
7. Ask yourself in every dealing with the opposite sex, "Would I feel comfortable revealing everything about this situation to my spouse?". The answer needs to ALWAYS be yes. If the answer is getting even close to no, then you must RUN from that situation.
8. Don't be alone anywhere with anyone of the opposite sex.
9. Don't talk about personal or sensitive issues with members of the opposite sex.
10. Don't joke too much with mvers of the opposite sex. Sticking to one joke a meeting is probably a good principle to follow.
11. Know yourself and set up any other guardrails that you feel are important for you to follow.
These will seem extreme to society, but they are not. They are wise. After all, these are the things that we all want our spouse and children to follow, so of course we should do these things ourselves.
It is important to realize that our society baits us to get involved with sexual immorality. Just look at media in our culture. They bait us and then scold if people actually succumb. Therefore, it is extremely important to set up guardrails which are VERY FAR from the line of what is inappropriate. This makes sure that you never get tons point that you shouldn't be in. It also ensures that if you bump onto one of your guardrails, your conscience feels terrible. It feels as if you have done something very sinful. This is a good thing if you have set your guardrails up properly. A proper guardrail is in a place that is not sinful, but again, since it is a meaningful guardrail to protect yourself and those you love, you should feel terrible.
I love Brie so incredibly much. And because of this I don't care if people think I am crazy or extreme in following these guardrails. They are not extreme, they are wise, and lead to a happier, more blessed marriage. Why wouldn't I keep these? It would be stupid not to.
In general, when it comes to decisions and guardrails, it is important to always make wise decisions right from the start. Once you give in to temptation once, it makes it easier to give in again, while at the same time it makes it more difficult to go back and stop resisting temptation. Set your boundaries and always stick into them right from the start.
Thursday, 6 March 2014
God's game plan for your life
In order to properly seek God for what His will is for my life, I need to look at the talents and abilities that He has give me. These talents and abilities are clues for what His plans are for my life. He has blessed me with certain talents and abilities so that I will develop them and use them to bless Him, others, and to further His Kingdom. This is displayed through Jesus' parable of the talents. I do not want to stand before God someday and have to answer for why I did not make the most of the talents and abilities He blessed me with. Therefore, I must always make sure that I am leaning into and developing the talents that God has blessed me with.
God does not look at us the way the world, or even we, look at ourselves. "God looks at the heart, not outward appearance.". Therefore, it is important to realize that God can use us in any way He sees fit. It doesn't matter what we think we may or may not be good at. If God wants to accomplish something through us then He will - as long as we are surrenders. The surrender is the "heart" part. God looks at our heart, and He can use us as long as we are surrendered. For this reason, we must always be examining our heart to ensure that we are surrendered.
God does not look at us the way the world, or even we, look at ourselves. "God looks at the heart, not outward appearance.". Therefore, it is important to realize that God can use us in any way He sees fit. It doesn't matter what we think we may or may not be good at. If God wants to accomplish something through us then He will - as long as we are surrenders. The surrender is the "heart" part. God looks at our heart, and He can use us as long as we are surrendered. For this reason, we must always be examining our heart to ensure that we are surrendered.
Tuesday, 4 March 2014
Making Righteous Decisions
There are some questions you should ask when making decisions.
1. Am I really being completely honest with myself?
Don't talk yourself into things that you want to do, or talk yourself out of things, when it is unwise to do so. We often self talk yourself into and out of things that are unwise just because we think we want it. We talk ourselves toward the things that we think we want. It is so important to be honest with ourselves. Need to find the real reasons why we want to make certain decisions. But if you want to make wise decisions, you need to be very honest with yourself and why you are so inclined to make certain decisions. Being honest with yourself will help you mkenwise decisions.
Jeremiah 17:9 says, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure". This means that we will always attempt to deceive ourselves into making the decisions that we want to make. Therefore, it is so important to honestly answer whether or not I am being honest with myself.
2. Pay attention to the tension.
When you are not sure whether or not something is right, when there is tension in your conscience, it is really important to pay attention to that. You need to allow that tension to grow as big as it is going to grow before I make a decision.
3. What decision will bring the greatest pleasure and glory to God.
Every decision, every thing that I ever do, I must be finding a way to bring glory to God through it. Everyone lives for someone's glory, and usually it is for our own, but the truth is that my glory is just too small to live for. And I was not created for my own glory, I was created for the glory of God. We are never fulfilled by living for our own glory. Any time I have ever tried to do this I have just ended up frustrated and feeling like an up humble jerk. But when I am living for the glory of God and drawing all attention to Him, I always feel better about myself. I feel fulfilled and joyful. Not only is this proof of God, but it also proves that I exist to glorify God, not myself.
1. Am I really being completely honest with myself?
Don't talk yourself into things that you want to do, or talk yourself out of things, when it is unwise to do so. We often self talk yourself into and out of things that are unwise just because we think we want it. We talk ourselves toward the things that we think we want. It is so important to be honest with ourselves. Need to find the real reasons why we want to make certain decisions. But if you want to make wise decisions, you need to be very honest with yourself and why you are so inclined to make certain decisions. Being honest with yourself will help you mkenwise decisions.
Jeremiah 17:9 says, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure". This means that we will always attempt to deceive ourselves into making the decisions that we want to make. Therefore, it is so important to honestly answer whether or not I am being honest with myself.
2. Pay attention to the tension.
When you are not sure whether or not something is right, when there is tension in your conscience, it is really important to pay attention to that. You need to allow that tension to grow as big as it is going to grow before I make a decision.
3. What decision will bring the greatest pleasure and glory to God.
Every decision, every thing that I ever do, I must be finding a way to bring glory to God through it. Everyone lives for someone's glory, and usually it is for our own, but the truth is that my glory is just too small to live for. And I was not created for my own glory, I was created for the glory of God. We are never fulfilled by living for our own glory. Any time I have ever tried to do this I have just ended up frustrated and feeling like an up humble jerk. But when I am living for the glory of God and drawing all attention to Him, I always feel better about myself. I feel fulfilled and joyful. Not only is this proof of God, but it also proves that I exist to glorify God, not myself.
Humbly accepting praise but shifting glory to God
God did not create us to do great things and then hold onto the glory. He created us to do great things by His grace and power. We are to graciously accept praise that comes from our accomplishments but we are then to try and find an appropriate way to say something along the lines of, "Thank you, but I must be honest. If it wasn't for God's grace, leading and strength in my life, I would never have been able to accomplish this." We always need to shift the glory away from us and give it all to God. I am not on earth for my glory, I am here to glorify God. That is why I was created. After all, anytime I even attempt to hold glory for myself, I never feel good about myself, and the "glory" fades and does not last. None of this is the case when giving God all the glory.
Thursday, 20 February 2014
Our Miracle Baby From God
December 2013
-Brie was cramping and bleeding. It seemed like this was another miscarriage for sure. It had all the signs. We, and many others were praying that God would allow this child to live and grow up to live for Him.
-about a week later Brie got an ultrasound which said the baby was alive and had a strong heartbeat. I remember waiting for the call from Brie in my classroom and getting a text from Dave Whitelaw. It was so cool to see God's hand on us and further proved that He was in control. Dave had no idea about the situation but said that God had laid Brie and I on his heart that morning and that he had been praying for us. It is so cool that God is always watching out for us. When we lost the baby in October 2012 we got a Facebook message from Luke Crawford saying that He felt God calling him to pray for us. It is so amazing that God loves us enough to actually lead others to pray for us. Praise Him!
I am so excited because I really feel lime God worked a miracle for us. He saved this child for us and is looking out for our entire family. Thank you Lord.
January 2014
Praise God!!!! The hematoma is gone! Brie and the baby are healthy and strong. This has been such an incredible rollercoaster ride, but Brie and I have been so blessed as we have trusted in God throughout this time. Here is what happened:
So many friends and family have been praying for Brie and the baby. We had the opportunity to go in for weekly ultrasounds. It was amazing being able to see the baby move around, suck its thumb, etc.. Being able to enjoy that with Aivry has also been nice. She thinks it's a girl :)
As we had been going in for the weekly ultrasounds they were tracking the hematoma. We were told at one point that it had gotten smaller, but then were called the next day and told that the ultrasound technician had been mistaken and that the hematoma had actually increased in size. We were encouraged to go to emerge to see if there was anything that should be done to help Brie and the baby. We were given the news that there was nothing that could be done and that unfortunately there was about a 50% chance that this pregnancy was going to end up in a miscarriage. During the ultrasounds, it was so difficult to see that hematoma right beside our beautiful baby, knowing that this hematoma could end our child's life. It was a helpless feeling, but we were placing it in God's hands, praying for a miracle and asking Him to protect our baby. We were asking Him to keep our baby healthy and safe and for the baby to be one which was born healthy and strong, and to become a person who loves who serves Him and spends eternity with Him one day.
We got our miracle. The hematoma had gotten a little smaller (praise God!) and had changed shape a bit, but after our last ultrasound, there had not been a lot of progress. The hematoma did not look like it was going away anytime soon. On the day that Brie was scheduled to go in for her latest ultrasound, I was teaching a lesson at school. I was writing something on the whiteboard when I looked up on the clock and saw that it was about time for Brie's ultrasound appointment. I prayed a small prayer to myself at the front of the room. I asked God to "please take this hematoma away. Please help it to not even be there anymore." And praise God, that is exactly what He did! The ultrasound technician said that she could not see any sign of the hematoma, and when we got the results back from the doctor this was confirmed. Not only was the hematoma gone, but Brie was told she now had a healthy pregnancy and no longer had to be on bed rest.
It has been so amazing to witness this miracle. What an amazing answer to prayer! It has been so cool to be able to share this miraculous answer to prayer with family, friends and co-workers.
THANK YOU GOD! PRAISE YOU LORD!!
-Brie was cramping and bleeding. It seemed like this was another miscarriage for sure. It had all the signs. We, and many others were praying that God would allow this child to live and grow up to live for Him.
-about a week later Brie got an ultrasound which said the baby was alive and had a strong heartbeat. I remember waiting for the call from Brie in my classroom and getting a text from Dave Whitelaw. It was so cool to see God's hand on us and further proved that He was in control. Dave had no idea about the situation but said that God had laid Brie and I on his heart that morning and that he had been praying for us. It is so cool that God is always watching out for us. When we lost the baby in October 2012 we got a Facebook message from Luke Crawford saying that He felt God calling him to pray for us. It is so amazing that God loves us enough to actually lead others to pray for us. Praise Him!
I am so excited because I really feel lime God worked a miracle for us. He saved this child for us and is looking out for our entire family. Thank you Lord.
January 2014
Praise God!!!! The hematoma is gone! Brie and the baby are healthy and strong. This has been such an incredible rollercoaster ride, but Brie and I have been so blessed as we have trusted in God throughout this time. Here is what happened:
So many friends and family have been praying for Brie and the baby. We had the opportunity to go in for weekly ultrasounds. It was amazing being able to see the baby move around, suck its thumb, etc.. Being able to enjoy that with Aivry has also been nice. She thinks it's a girl :)
As we had been going in for the weekly ultrasounds they were tracking the hematoma. We were told at one point that it had gotten smaller, but then were called the next day and told that the ultrasound technician had been mistaken and that the hematoma had actually increased in size. We were encouraged to go to emerge to see if there was anything that should be done to help Brie and the baby. We were given the news that there was nothing that could be done and that unfortunately there was about a 50% chance that this pregnancy was going to end up in a miscarriage. During the ultrasounds, it was so difficult to see that hematoma right beside our beautiful baby, knowing that this hematoma could end our child's life. It was a helpless feeling, but we were placing it in God's hands, praying for a miracle and asking Him to protect our baby. We were asking Him to keep our baby healthy and safe and for the baby to be one which was born healthy and strong, and to become a person who loves who serves Him and spends eternity with Him one day.
We got our miracle. The hematoma had gotten a little smaller (praise God!) and had changed shape a bit, but after our last ultrasound, there had not been a lot of progress. The hematoma did not look like it was going away anytime soon. On the day that Brie was scheduled to go in for her latest ultrasound, I was teaching a lesson at school. I was writing something on the whiteboard when I looked up on the clock and saw that it was about time for Brie's ultrasound appointment. I prayed a small prayer to myself at the front of the room. I asked God to "please take this hematoma away. Please help it to not even be there anymore." And praise God, that is exactly what He did! The ultrasound technician said that she could not see any sign of the hematoma, and when we got the results back from the doctor this was confirmed. Not only was the hematoma gone, but Brie was told she now had a healthy pregnancy and no longer had to be on bed rest.
It has been so amazing to witness this miracle. What an amazing answer to prayer! It has been so cool to be able to share this miraculous answer to prayer with family, friends and co-workers.
THANK YOU GOD! PRAISE YOU LORD!!
Wednesday, 19 February 2014
God's righteous jealousy
God is very clear in His Word that He is a jealous God. Many people try and argue that this is a form if hypocrisy because He says that jealousy is wrong. When you examine God's jealoisy , however; you realize very quickly that He is talking about a type of jealousy that is a good kind. It is a kind of jealousy that we should be thankful that He displays. It is also a form if jealousy that all if us should be displaying in certain situations.
Bad jealousy is the type where you want something that does not belong to you, but rather belongs to someone else. The good jealousy that God displays is the kind where one is jealous for something that does belong to them but is wrongfully drifting towards someone or something else.
In our relationship with God, He is jealous for our heart. He wants all of our heart, and rightfully so. He loves us more than we can imagine and He knows what is best for us. He is what is best for us and therefore He wants to live in close communion with Him. Unfortunately however, we are often far too easily satisfied. We try to find fulfillment in things other than God. This makes God extremely jealous because something else is competing with Him for our heart. He alone must be what we find our fulfillment in because He alone provides TRUE fulfillment. Sometimes we can also fall into the trap of thinking that we are completely surrendered to God and are finding our fulfillment in Him when in reality we are not.
Often times the reality is that we are half-heartedly pursuing God, while pursuing other things as well and attempting to find fulfillment in those things. Once again, we must never allow ourselves to be far too easily satisfied. We may think that we are fulfilled by the things we are pursuing and enjoying, and we may think that we are fulfilled by the little bit of God that we are devoting our time to pursuing, but the reality is that until we completely surrender ourselves to God and are completely sold out for Him, we will not know true happiness and fulfillment.
God wants so badly to have this type of relationship with Him, but He will not force it. He says in the Bible, "I stand at the door and knock". He created us and therefore knows what is best for us. He wants to provide it, but we must do our part and pursue Him wholeheartedly. I know from my personal life experiences that I have NEVER been disappointed by Him.
Greater fullfilment can even be found in the things that we enjoy doing when we choose to make God the center of them and do them for His glory. When we decide to worship God with our efforts in all things, and surrender all results to Him, it ensures that we are keeping our focus on Him and finding our fulfillment in Him alone. When we do this, not only will our our relationship with God improve, but we will find greater enjoyment in the things that we enjoy doing. This is because our attitude toward them is in line with the attitude God wants us to have, and anytime that happens we are in the right place to experience true joy and fulfillment. We must never find fulfillment in anything or anyone but God.
I don't believe God will ever bless any of our efforts in anything where that thing is competing with Him for our heart. Our heart belongs to God. He is jealous for it. If ever we are pursuing something and itncompetes with God, I just cannot believe that He will allow us to be fully blessed in it. While this is a result if His jealousy, it is also a result of His love. We are so far better off when we are completely surrendered to Him.
If God truly has my heart, then I will be can mpletely surrendered to Him. HE ALONE WILL BE ENOUGH FOR ME. I will work hard at all things, but be surrendered tonwhatnit becomes, letting Him decide, for I long for Him and Him alone.
Deuteronomy 4:15-31
Deuteronomy 5:4-10
Nahum 1:1-15
Exodus 20:1-7
Psalm 104:1-35
Psalm 78:56-64
Bad jealousy is the type where you want something that does not belong to you, but rather belongs to someone else. The good jealousy that God displays is the kind where one is jealous for something that does belong to them but is wrongfully drifting towards someone or something else.
In our relationship with God, He is jealous for our heart. He wants all of our heart, and rightfully so. He loves us more than we can imagine and He knows what is best for us. He is what is best for us and therefore He wants to live in close communion with Him. Unfortunately however, we are often far too easily satisfied. We try to find fulfillment in things other than God. This makes God extremely jealous because something else is competing with Him for our heart. He alone must be what we find our fulfillment in because He alone provides TRUE fulfillment. Sometimes we can also fall into the trap of thinking that we are completely surrendered to God and are finding our fulfillment in Him when in reality we are not.
Often times the reality is that we are half-heartedly pursuing God, while pursuing other things as well and attempting to find fulfillment in those things. Once again, we must never allow ourselves to be far too easily satisfied. We may think that we are fulfilled by the things we are pursuing and enjoying, and we may think that we are fulfilled by the little bit of God that we are devoting our time to pursuing, but the reality is that until we completely surrender ourselves to God and are completely sold out for Him, we will not know true happiness and fulfillment.
God wants so badly to have this type of relationship with Him, but He will not force it. He says in the Bible, "I stand at the door and knock". He created us and therefore knows what is best for us. He wants to provide it, but we must do our part and pursue Him wholeheartedly. I know from my personal life experiences that I have NEVER been disappointed by Him.
Greater fullfilment can even be found in the things that we enjoy doing when we choose to make God the center of them and do them for His glory. When we decide to worship God with our efforts in all things, and surrender all results to Him, it ensures that we are keeping our focus on Him and finding our fulfillment in Him alone. When we do this, not only will our our relationship with God improve, but we will find greater enjoyment in the things that we enjoy doing. This is because our attitude toward them is in line with the attitude God wants us to have, and anytime that happens we are in the right place to experience true joy and fulfillment. We must never find fulfillment in anything or anyone but God.
I don't believe God will ever bless any of our efforts in anything where that thing is competing with Him for our heart. Our heart belongs to God. He is jealous for it. If ever we are pursuing something and itncompetes with God, I just cannot believe that He will allow us to be fully blessed in it. While this is a result if His jealousy, it is also a result of His love. We are so far better off when we are completely surrendered to Him.
If God truly has my heart, then I will be can mpletely surrendered to Him. HE ALONE WILL BE ENOUGH FOR ME. I will work hard at all things, but be surrendered tonwhatnit becomes, letting Him decide, for I long for Him and Him alone.
Deuteronomy 4:15-31
Deuteronomy 5:4-10
Nahum 1:1-15
Exodus 20:1-7
Psalm 104:1-35
Psalm 78:56-64
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